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This is what Success Looks Like
I admit, this is a topic I've been wanting to address for a long, looooong time, but always found myself choking on.
Success.
Ugh, even typing it makes my throat tighten.
You see, success is one of those buzzwords that gets thrown around when people start chatting about pursuing their dreams. Usually, it comes from an oh-so-caring family member or passerby that just wants to make sure that you're not setting yourself up to live on the street.
They approach you with concern (or dripping malice) in their eyes. "Sure," they say "you want to be an artist, writer, musician, or a street performing acrobat, but will you be s-u-c-c-e-s-s-f-u-l at it?"
Pick up any self-help book addressing artistic careers, or small businesses and they'll paint a lavish image of future you, living an easy and charming life with enough money to buy a sports team and pursue acting as a hobby on the side. You'll dine with Beyonce in Nepal and cozy up to the YouTube famous on your private yacht. It's all so glamorous and obtainable and OF COURSE you want that too, don't you? Don't have time to read the whole library on success? Not to worry, you can read Etsy's newsletters for the cliffnotes version.
The common definition of success goes a little something like this: To be successful, you have to make money. To make money, you have to be famous. To be famous, you have to be successful. Oh, and it will all happen overnight, or the Fates have deemed you unworthy.
It's also a vicious cycle that's horribly flawed, and creates an all-or-nothing mentality. For years, I've known that creating art is a necessary part of my being, yet I quietly believed that I had to be famous and raking in tons of cash at conventions to justify my needs. Let me say that again: I felt that I had to be rich and famous in order to justify my existence.
I told myself that no one would take me seriously as an artist otherwise, and I've met plenty of other creatives who have felt the same way. And plenty more who haven't even tried to chase their dreams because they know they won't be successful. And even more who found fame and fortune (at least in comparison to my station in life) and quit because it wasn't enough.
So, let me present to you, Dear Reader, what success actually looks like:
It looks like you.
Maybe you want to be a stay-at-home mom and write a cooking blog. Or, perhaps, you want to move to acting full time. Heck, maybe your definition is obtaining a couple college degrees while selling at conventions and learning to run a business. I don't necessarily recommend the last one (GUESS WHO PICKED THAT ROUTE), but if that's what will fulfil you, go nuts.
How you define success is the correct answer.
True success is not a glamorous word. It's filled with hard work, doubt, failures, and crying your eyes out. If you're looking to make a sustainable life for yourself, it will be filled with harrowing financial pitfalls too. And it will take years to get where want to go. I'm on year 9 of this crazy ride, and I'm just now hitting a jogging pace.
It won't be easy, and you may not get that YouTuber filled yacht but as long as your pursuit fulfills you, the struggle is worth it. So take some time today, tomorrow, and in the days to come, to reflect on how you would like to define your success. Be specific in your generalities, but general with your specifics. Instead of, "I have to a 15k social media following," say "I want to be a better photographer." Focus on your growth, not hard numbers. Focusing on numbers, like money and age, will only cultivate disappointment if you don't reach those exact goals.
So, tell me: How will you define your success?
